Chapter 271 — A Pair of Twin Sisters

Shen Mu and the Little Poison King had swapped prescriptions seven or eight times in a row, and both were somewhat flustered; after all, it was their first time working together, and there were bound to be rough edges, places where their coordination fell short. What was more, each was nursing a stubborn determination to get the better of the other.

The tonic Shen Mu had put into that red pill for the Little Poison King was not merely thirty or fifty times the normal dose but close to sixty times, and the vial of poison the Little Poison King had given Shen Mu had likewise been strengthened. The two were testing each other's skill, but the Emperor and the Imperial Preceptor of Jingping were the ones who suffered for it, tormented by the pair until they were half dead and yet unable to move, unable to struggle, unable to cry for help. The Emperor's body began to shrink.

Before long it had shrunk to its usual size, but it kept shrinking, and soon it was as small as a newborn infant. "I really ought to have hidden axemen all around this hall and had them hack these two villainous miracle doctors to pieces.

. .

" thought the Emperor, drowned in hair. Meanwhile the Imperial Preceptor of Jingping's body was swelling.

Not only swelling, the Imperial Preceptor also felt as though something had grown out of his backside, something like a furry tail. His armpits itched too, and he sensed extra bones sprouting from the bones of his shoulders, crack crack crack, growing outward, as though a pair of wings were about to emerge. Had two great wings grown out, that would have been one thing; the trouble was that they stopped growing at a foot or so.

The bodies of the two men turned now icy cold, now burning hot; sometimes it was as if they had fallen into hell and were rolling on a mountain of knives, and sometimes it was as if they had become immortals or gods, utterly blissful, but bliss was the most dangerous state of all, for it meant their souls were dissolving. At other times pains came surging from every part of their bodies, a thousand times worse than heart-piercing agony; at other times it was as if ten thousand needles had pierced them all over; at still others it was as if they had been steeped in a jar of unbearably sour vinegar.

In the great hall, Shen Mu sat on the hair that carpeted the floor, brush in one hand, chin propped on the other, staring blankly into space.

Not far off, the Little Poison King paced anxiously back and forth, brows locked, ceaselessly calculating how to effect a cure. Both had run into difficulties; several times Shen Mu lifted his brush and could not bring it down, and several times the Little Poison King snatched up his brush and laid it down again. Outside the hall, Ling Yuxiu poked her head in, and seeing the two of them fretting, asked in a low voice, "Cowherd, how goes it?

" Before Shen Mu could answer, the Little Poison King chuckled. "You must be the Sixth Princess? " Ling Yuxiu thought for a moment.

"My brother is now the eldest prince, so I suppose I really am sixth in rank.

" "The eldest prince, that is, the present Crown Prince Yushu.

" The Little Poison King said stiffly, "Congratulations, Sixth Princess. By this quack's method of treatment, your brother will soon be able to ascend the throne and proclaim himself emperor.

" Ling Yuxiu was startled.

She looked imploringly at Shen Mu and stammered, on the verge of tears, "Cowherd, are you really going to doctor my father to death?

" "Don't be afraid, little sister.

He won't die.

" Shen Mu comforted her, then sneered, "Before I doctor the Emperor to death, the Imperial Preceptor of Jingping will have been treated to death by this fool. Without the Imperial Preceptor of Jingping to prop up your brother, even if he becomes emperor he won't last a few days before he is overthrown!

" Ling Yuxiu was about to cry. "You are just trying to frighten me, aren't you?

" The Little Poison King said mockingly, "The Imperial Preceptor of Jingping may die at my hands, but it is your tonic that will have killed him!

" Shen Mu retorted, "The Emperor may die at my hands, but it is your poison that will have killed him, and you will not leave this palace alive! " The two glared at each other, eyes blazing, each longing to poison the other on the spot. Ling Yuxiu was furious.

"You two!

If you doctor my father and the Imperial Preceptor of Jingping to death, neither of you will leave this palace alive!

Where are the axemen? The axemen!

" Emperor Yanfeng and the Imperial Preceptor of Jingping both breathed a sigh of relief.

"Yuxiu (the Sixth Princess) is the sensible one after all," they thought. "Otherwise, if these two bastards keep fighting, we will die even if we were not going to.

" The imperial guards of the palace came swarming and stationed themselves outside the hall. Ling Yuxiu, murderous in her bearing, planted her hands on her hips and said to the two of them, "The axemen are right outside.

You will both do as I say!

You cannot hold his tonic in check, and you cannot control his poison, so just trade places! You, the ugly one, you treat my father. Cowherd, you treat the Imperial Preceptor of Jingping! " Shen Mu rose and looked at the Little Poison King.

"Trade patients," he said gravely.

The Little Poison King's eyes lit up.

"You treat the Imperial Preceptor of Jingping, I treat the Emperor, who knows, it might work wonders!

" The two promptly swapped patients and examined the Emperor's and the Imperial Preceptor of Jingping's conditions.

After the examination, both let out a breath and exchanged a glance. A moment earlier Shen Mu had nearly decided to take Long Qilin and hide out in the Desolate Ruins for a while, and the Little Poison King had likewise planned to slip out of the palace and live under an assumed name; as for the palace experts outside who wanted to detain them, that would have been a stretch, no more than the matter of a single dose of poison. But after switching patients, they found that each was exactly the one who could clean up the other's mess, and so there was no longer any need to worry about fleeing for their lives after doctoring the Emperor and the Imperial Preceptor of Jingping to death.

Shen Mu and the Little Poison King each took up a brush and wrote out a pill formula, then had the imperial physicians come in to take the formula and fetch the medicines. The two treated their patients with great care, constantly revising the prescriptions, and after two or three days the hair on the Emperor's body fell away, and the silkworm cocoon around the Imperial Preceptor of Jingping's body sank back inside him.

The Imperial Preceptor's injuries gradually eased; the residual power of the god's divine ability grew ever fainter, and he was gradually able to muster a thread of cultivation again.

As for the Emperor, though his spirit treasury was still in ruins, the Little Poison King used countless venomous spiders to transport vital essence and life force and rebuild it, and with the potent life force in Shen Mu's pills transformed into self-repairing power, there should be no great problem. It was only a matter of time before the two of them recovered from their injuries.

Ling Yuxiu summoned some eunuchs and had them clean out the palace hall. These eunuchs carted off the fallen hair in more than a dozen cartloads, and the tail, wings, and superfluous arms and legs that had dropped from the Imperial Preceptor of Jingping filled another whole cart.

"By and large there is no more danger. " Shen Mu looked at the Little Poison King, and the Little Poison King happened to look his way as well; each gave a cold laugh. Ling Yuxiu, as if facing a mortal enemy, was thrown into a panic.

"No more fighting!